Trapped

We've been in our house for two years now and other than a mouse in the garage last winter (don't get me started on him...that's a story for another day), we haven't seen hide nor hair of a critter in the house besides Trooper. Yesterday, however, when I was downstairs going out to feed the birds and squirrels, I noticed a problem...a tiny hole in a 40 pound bag of black sunflower seed and an assortment of cracked shells in a messy pile on the floor.

Damn!

All the other seed and feed are in plastic bins, but we had gotten an extra bag of the sunflower seeds because we got such a good price (you may recall our critter food shopping adventure...).  Sure enough, some crafty critter -- inside our house -- found the unprotected bag and was gobbling it up.

I'm sorry, but if you're hungry, go eat outside like everyone else!  It's not like there's a shortage of food for crying out loud.

The first thing I did when I realized what had happened was dash into the pantry to grab the overstock of cereal (another sale) and tortilla chips (which I get through work in large quantities) and lug them upstairs. No smouse is eatin' those goodies! And then I went to fetch one of the mouse traps we had just put in the garage -- last weekend of all things.

No mouse traps in the house for two years and we just happened to buy some last weekend?  There are no coincidences...

In our previous house, we had one winter episode where a mouse had gotten in and was snacking in the basement pantry.  The word pantry always makes me think of Lyle Lovett...for a little diversion, listen to Lyle sing about keeping it in the pantry -- so funny!  LOVE THIS SONG!

Now, where was I??

Right...so in the old house there was a mouse. We bought a live trap and caught the little critter and put him out in the snow. After which we caught another. Then there were babies. Caught them, too. Every single one of them alive and well and back out to pasture. And then there were none. Somehow, we managed to survive the minus three day gestation period (seriously...how do they procreate so quickly!), babies and all. Without killing a single one.

I know...but being the animal lover I am, I couldn't bear a trap that killed them.

The traps we found last weekend on an impulse buy while preparing the garage for winter were kill traps, but ones where you don't have to see them once the deed is done. Nice and convenient...and cowardly. Disposable traps for a disposable culture...which is why I'd rather just catch them live and turn them out packing.  Anyway, I put one of the kill traps down by the bird seed. And not more than 12 hours later...

...I was instrumental in killing the first non-buggy living thing in my life. :(

I'm not proud of how glad I was that it was an anonymous death.  I daintily carried the trap into the garage for T to deal with when he got home from work.

Yep, I'm one of those.

I did say a little prayer for him and wished him well on his journey to smousy heaven.  Threw in another little prayer that any future critter will locate the three live traps that are now (to T's chagrin) surrounding the area before finding the pre-tested -- and decidedly more final -- one.

And threw in a third that he was acting alone.//

What's For Dinner Tonight?
Going further on the warm salad theme (nice scene change, huh??), I made a grilled chicken wrap for dinner tonight.  It looked a bit more like a salad taco when I was done because I only had small tortillas, but it tasted great, which is all that matters!

First, I put a tortilla on a dry hot pan with a little shredded cheese on it, to melt.  The dry pan is able to get the tortilla crispy without the added fat (she says showing a picture of melted cheese...).  Uh huh.

Meanwhile, in a bowl I combined baby spinach, red leaf lettuce, chunked grilled chicken, a crumbled slice of bacon, a few chopped green olives (I'm usually not a big olive eater but it sounded good tonight for some reason and was fantastic in the mix!).  Added a tablespoon of roasted garlic caesar dressing (found at Whole Foods)...

YUM!  And tossed it all up,

transferring it to the warm tortilla.  Served with some green grapes on the side.

Perfect quick meal for an incredibly busy, and slightly traumatic day.

What's for dinner for you this fine evening?

Hooty the owl says, "Good Night!"

Week 19 - Surrender, reprise

As I sit to write, another winter storm rolls in. The mild temperatures and melting snow of the past week or so, the patches of grass that were lusciously beginning to reveal themselves, are again a thing of the past. At least for now. Inevitably, the snow will indeed melt and the sun will reign supreme once again. But not nearly soon enough. I want it now.

I'd be lying if I said it didn't matter. It does and I'm antsy. The warmer, sunnier days helped, but Mother Nature is a tease. She tempts us and then when we put away our heaviest winter gear, whomps us again. I like lazy Sunday afternoons like the best of them. I especially like snow days. But not now. Not like this. Why is she doing this to me?!?

Boo hoo! Of course that's what I'd like to believe -- that this is personal. That on some level the Universe and Mother Nature have conspired to torture me. But the truth is, what happens, happens. What is, is. We are not victims, but simply here in this experience. It's winter in Minnesota -- what do I expect? It's up to us to respond to what is before us, not react to the perceived injustice of the situation because it doesn't match what we want it to be.

Outside the window, the squirrels and birds will not be deterred. The cardinals that began singing in earnest from the treetops a week ago in the warmth, continue. The squirrels never cease their pillaging of the feeders. The weather is the weather and they live their lives, doing what they do, being who they are, one song and one snack at a time. Why should we be any different?

I haven't written on time these past few weeks, frankly because the weather warmed up and I was out in the world more. Life called for me to be more active and I responded to the call, which left less time to sit and contemplate and write. Understandable and in being with what is. But I'm uncomfortable with that. I made a commitment to write every Tuesday and with the past few weeks being busier, I haven't held up my end of the bargain...even if no one notices but me. It feels like a slippery slope -- if I'm not writing now, if I'm willing to let part of the commitment go, will the whole project fall apart? Or am I just being dramatic because it fuels the desire to react rather than respond...to force rather than surrender?

More likely, I'm moving into another phase of the process. Life has been pretty mellow the past month or so and I've gotten used to it, gotten used to the routine. Then things begin to change...the weather became warmer, I became more comfortable stretching my wings and getting out in the world more. Like the pendulum ride I mentioned over the holidays, there is a time for activity and a time for solitude and contemplation. When we force one or the other we get antsy. When we're present, there is room for what is needed. And consequently, because we are in flow with what is called for, there is peace.

When we allow ourselves to surrender to what is, we aren't giving up...we are simply letting go of the need to fight, to control and to be right. It occurs to me that this, above all, may be the true reason I've undertaken this journey to invite meditation into my day-to-day: I've spent the better part of my life at war with myself either expecting circumstances to be different, or worse, myself. I'm happy to make the space to let that go...and to let acceptance and compassion and love take its place.

The tricky part is remembering all over again, how to surrender. Gratefully, this experience is yet another reminder.

Today, if I go with what is, is easy...a fire in the fireplace, a steaming cup of tea and a write of this blog. And so I respond accordingly. I'll save the song and the snack for later...//